“Out of 500 interviews on my show,” the podcast host said, “you’re the first.”
Raising an eyebrow, I asked, “First what?”
“The first to say that some people need less grit, not more.”
Society has placed grit on a pedestal. It’s the stuff of motivational Instagram posts and movie montages. The motto? Never. Ever. Give. Up.
But quitting? That’s reserved for the so-called faint-hearted—the ones who couldn’t hack it. “Winners never quit, and quitters never win,” as the bumper-sticker wisdom goes.
Don’t get me wrong: Grit matters. You shouldn’t abandon ship at the first sign of rough seas. If you flinch at every obstacle, you won’t make it very far.
But here’s the twist: Grit can become a trap. Determination becomes harmful when you keep doing what’s not working—when you walk the same path even as every signpost screams: Wrong Direction!
A few years ago, I found myself there. I was a tenured law professor with a lifetime guarantee of a paycheck. Getting tenure took grit—grinding out academic papers, chasing perfect evaluations, checking every institutional box.
And there’s one thing tenured professors don’t do: quit their jobs.
But I came to a startling realization. My academic career—one that I once loved—was no longer for me.
Beneath the security of tenure lurked monotony: repeated academic papers, identical courses, déjà vu committee meetings.
There was no novelty, no growth.
My curiosity shifted to writing and speaking to broader audiences. And I couldn’t fully step into who I was becoming without letting go of who I once was.
So, I strayed from the safe path—and the advice of my colleagues—and decided to experiment with other potential futures. After tasting success as an author and speaker, I finally quit academia.
Just because a younger version of you dreamt a dream doesn’t mean you’re forever tied to it.
The 35-year-old you has little in common with the 25-year-old you. If you doubt that, scroll through your old social media posts. Once you’re done wincing at those captions—and those outfits—ask yourself: Why live by the choices of that person?
And the next time you’re pushing against the tide with grit, pause and reflect.
Are you actually swimming with purpose? Is this the direction you still want to go?
Or are you stubbornly battling the waves because of old habits, external pressures, or fear of change?
True grit isn’t just about holding on.
Sometimes, it’s about letting go—and finding the courage to swim toward new waters.
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